Beyond the Island

by John W. Steele

conclusion

The nightmares that had disturbed me so long had given up their secret, and I struggled with the revelation. Although Max’s tale made sense, I could not accept his explanation. I could not fathom that I had existed in the infinite past. I clung to my concept of good and evil. It is impossible that a man can be born more than once.

I searched for a loophole in Max’s story. “Even if everything you are saying is true, Max, I don’t understand why you needed me to assist you with this. You could have easily taken the lamenters without my help.”

“Easily?” Max said. “All forms of life are sacred to a Nagual. No entity that has risen to the consciousness of a Nagual would ever dream of harming even a fly unless it was in self-defense. The Unborn dwells in all life forms. Only an insane person would dare kill for pleasure or money. A Nagual cannot take a life, not even one of its own. That responsibility rests with the Lord of Death alone, and he is the only intelligence that has the perception to deal with the energies of karma.”

“I still don’t get it, Max. It doesn’t make sense.”

“After Leto reduced the palace to ashes, anyone who remained loyal to you was beheaded. Gone forever was the innocent glory of the past; the devolution of Darsoom had begun. Your last days were a testimony to this. You were favored by the Unborn, and when you died, the illusion of Darsoom died with you.

“Your life is your love, Brian, and your ruling love creates the world you inhabit beyond the island. If your love is hatred and cruelty, the ruling love becomes your world. Once the interiors are opened, the true man emerges, and all the masked hypocrisies disappear.

“How did Karen end up here?” I asked

“After a long slumber, Tatiana awakened in the world of spirits between Heaven and Hell. The memories stored in her awareness emerged. A great sorrow came upon her, and her heart could find no peace. She chose to wander in a realm of darkness and contemplation for a long time.

“Though she was not entirely to blame for what had occurred on Darsoom, a great rift had formed in the impulse of her vibration. The power of sorcery can cause irreparable harm. She’d unwittingly tampered with the silver cord that connected her to her Nagual.

“The Lord of Death measures motive, and though her motive was selfish, it was rooted in a form of love and was not hostile. But the result was the same. She’d helped to destroy the two people that meant more to her than anyone in her awareness. After an age in solitude, she consulted her Nagual for a way to ease the suffering she had caused and to balance the energies.

“Tatiana agreed to be reborn on an island and to be cut down in her prime. Karen had to learn the pain of losing a loved one through the selfish actions of another, and her son Alex was chosen to aid her in this lesson. By this sacrifice, Karen has stilled the Pendacle. After we return her to her Nagual, she will be reborn to a better life in the pure land.”

I could scarcely believe what Max was telling me but I’d learned that reality is only what we think it is. I knew the evidence in my life could not be ignored. Though I could not see my past lives, Max described them with such lucid detail that I could not objectively disregard his psychic analysis.

I looked over at my beloved Karen and felt heartbroken at the thought of losing her. A deep sadness came over me. I could understand why she did what she did. “Will I ever see Karen again?”

“Do you love her, Brian?”

I did not want Max to know the depth my feeling and I looked away. “Yes, I love her.”

“And by this sacrifice, she has proven that she loves you. Therefore you will see each other again. A karmic link has been established, and no force in the universe can keep you apart. You found each other after ages of separation and untold light-years of emptiness. You will find each other again.”

The curse of time grew keenly apparent. The aftermath of its authority burned like a red-hot iron plunged into the eye of my awareness. “Patience is such a difficult thing, Max. I’ve lost all strength for it. I’ve grown weary of living on hope. This revelation will not make my loss any easier to bear.”

Max gazed into the distance and his face lost all expression. “Bittersweet is the wonder of love, Brian, for in the realm of Id, it always ends in pain.”

For once I understood what Max said. I knew he was dead on about the power of love, and I had tried to escape its clutches. But despite all my efforts, I was living its consequences now. For me the world had grown repugnant. Its treasures no longer shone. Once they were discovered, it always seemed they were incomplete and never brought me the satisfaction I thought they would. Soon the last page of our mystery together would be revealed, and I wanted to know why such things as this occur.

“What about the others, Max? What happened to them?”

“Did you kill anyone, Brian?”

“Well, no but...”

“The others have a Nagual as well and their Naguals longed for closure from the guilt created by murder and betrayal. Their crime had a motive of a different nature because they knew what they were doing, and that cause produced energies far more insidious. Our efforts have helped them along the path, and we have eased the torment of the effect their actions had in their lives. But they have much to learn and have added another chain to the manacle of becoming.

“The Naguals of the lamenters asked me for our assistance. Because you were the one offended, there is no karmic debt in your actions. At their request, we delivered the lamenters to the Lord of Death but we did not harm them.

“The Lord of Death rarely goes where he is not invited, and we had to bring the sorcerers to him. It is a complicated procedure and requires great deliberation by all involved. But the lamentation is a sure way to balance the power and restore equilibrium to a Nagual who is impeded by a fetter of dark energy. It’s a nasty job but someone has to do it. It can only be accomplished if the lamentation is recognized by the Lord of Death.”

“Have all of the Naguals found peace?” I asked.

“All of them but Ursula. She’s a tough case. Because of a long chain of events in which she chose the wrong windows, her mind was destroyed, and she is emotionally disturbed. During her last incarnation, she poisoned two of her lovers and tried to kill another one by burning his house down. The Lord of Death decided to remove her from her island before she did so much damage that she devolved to a vibration from which there was no return.

“We used you to bring Ursula to the Lord of Death and curtail the progression of her negative causes. She now dwells in a psychic asylum that you know as purgatory. She will receive the proper treatment there and perhaps sometime be reborn to an island.”

“What about Leto? What became of him?”

Max laughed. “Leto is just another worthless stooge, and Mara used him like he uses anyone who forgets where he came from. Mara is cunning and holds no loyalty to anyone. The Lord of Illusion exists only to enslave and destroy. After Mara used Leto to defile and demolish anything of value on Darsoom, Leto descended to a lower vibration where he was reborn as an imp. You met Leto again, don’t you remember?”

I rubbed my chin and tried to remember who he was speaking about. “I don’t remember meeting, Leto?” I said.

“That’s because he lost much of his authority, and upon rebirth in Hell his name was changed to Nestor. In the end, you destroyed him.”

The look on Nestor’s face the day I took him out flashed in my mind. Regardless of how hard things were, my victory over him had been satisfying, and my life was better since I’d destroyed him. “Does that mean that good always triumphs over evil, Max?”

“Good and evil wear the same mask, Brian. When your eyes are opened you will understand this.”

I felt my eyes were opened enough and I shuddered at the implication. “What will happen now?” I asked.

“The stars hold many secrets, Brian, and they are filled with great knowledge. The heavens portend that my work in the dimension of Id is nearly finished. Soon I will evolve beyond Id and merge once again with the Unborn. It is for release from the mind-stain of enlightenment that I have struggled untold lifetimes. Soon I will transcend the prison of concepts and become one with the Absolute. This priceless treasure is our birthright, and the Unborn always grants to a man that for which he strives.

“The fragmented borders of consciousness and the limited understanding that is the realm of Id will pass away never to return. I am ancient, Brian, and full of ages. Soon... very soon I shall become extinct.

“My faithful apprentice Roger will be ordained as the Lord Nagual of this vibration. He is well capable of assuming the duties of my station. After my departure from Id, Roger will act as your benefactor, and you will deal directly with him.”

I hung my head. Part of me was filled with relief that I would be rid of a portentous mind-breaker, and another part of me knew that I was going to lose a great teacher and friend. A tear formed in my eye. “I don’t understand you, Lord Nagual, but I wish you well.”

The Nagual did not answer. The light of the flames illumined his features, and I realized there was nothing about Max that was human any longer. He looked like fossil from a time and a dimension long forgotten. But I knew he was the noblest creature I would ever know and that a part of me would depart from Id with him.

“What will happen when you leave Id?” I asked.

A gentle smile formed on Lord Nagual’s face. “No one knows. That knowledge is occult and does not exist in the realm of Id. But to merge with the Unborn is to be freed from all desire and sensation. My thoughts on this subject are merely opinions, and to get caught up in opinions is a mistake.

“Perhaps when a consciousness merges with the Unborn, a new universe is created that acts as an eye in the ever-expanding vastness of hyper-cosmic infinitude. After endless struggle, I revealed that Id is an illusion, and the mind-gem of awareness does not end there. The true gift of consciousness is that it can expand for eternity.”

The sun was gone behind the mountain, and it was beginning to grow dark. I knew there was no escape from my predicament, and it would be impossible to save Karen. It stung like hell, but I had to accept our fate and move on.

“You’re not doing me any favors leaving me here to face the music, Max. Surely Karen’s acquaintances will look for her when she doesn’t show up for work. That puts me directly in the crosshairs.”

“You’ve been in the crosshairs all your life, pork chop. I made sure of that.” Max laughed.

I wanted to rise above my helplessness but I found nothing humorous in his joke. I forced a chuckle but it sounded like a grunt.

“You worry too much about what doesn’t matter and too little about what does. You’re a strange one even for an apprentice. But you’ve convinced me the Absolute has a sense of humor, and that is your saving grace.

“The Naguals of Karen’s friends will place engrams in their minds. Islanders love fairy tales. The rumor will be that she ran off with a millionaire and got married. Her friends will receive a few emails, and she’ll brag about how deliriously happy she is. Soon after, Karen’s supervisor will receive a post card from Hawaii. On it, will be scribbled a few lines about the honeymoon and the fabulous sugar sand beaches.

“After a small span of memories, they’ll all return to the wheel and grind out the remainder of their days on the island. By design, Karen has no one, and in time, her memory will drift over in the desert of yesterday. It will be as if she never existed.”

From deep inside the portal, bells began to chime. The voice of death flowed into the room like a sad and haunting melody.

“I’m sorry, Brian. It’s time.”

My eyes stung, and I rubbed them hard. “What about the extra years of life you promised me, Max.”

“Do you still want them?”

I looked at Karen one last time, and a tear trickled down my cheek. “No... I don’t believe I do.”

Max did not answer.

Karen moaned. The Lord Nagual walked over to the couch and lifted her in his arms. He looked at her, his eyes soft and shining. I knew he was incapable of harming her. His face grew empty, and he looked away when he spoke. “Good-bye, Brian. I will be with you always.”

I fought back my tears and struggled to control the emotion that gripped my awareness. Max raised his head, and I saw a silver trickle of light in the corner of his eye. Max gazed at me, and we shared a long sustained look. “We are the same, Brian. Take heart. Surely by now you know the illusion lasts only five minutes, and all that dwells in the realm of Id is born to die.”

The portal opened wide and revealed the most glorious turquoise sky I had ever seen. It was a shade of blue that was alive and teeming with creation like the bosom of the Great Mother. The sky was filled with birds of every distinction. There were condors, eagles, hawks and crows. Sparrows and hummingbirds sailed in the gentle breezes. Each bird soared in the space that it had been allotted, and there was a harmony and impossible perfection in the grand design. The birds sang sweetly, and the sky was filled with the spirit of life.

The Nagual cradled Karen in his arms and walked on a trail of jewels into the vast unknown. The lava began to recede, and I watched all that I ever cherished ascend into the azure infinitude.

From the corner of my eye, I saw a shape appear behind them. The shape was tiny, but when I focused on the form, I could see it was Karen’s little friend, Sammy.

The cat pranced behind them, its tail raised high in the air. Sammy stopped abruptly, turned, and faced me. I could see clearly his innocent blue eyes, and I admired their sincerity.

Sammy blinked at me three times, and then in a flash, the cat transformed into a giant Siberian Snow Tiger. The tiger’s muscles were powerful and defined, and its presence was fierce and terrifying. A feeling of awe shot through me. I wanted to run. The tiger yawned and exposed its gleaming ivory teeth, then turned and followed Karen into the sky.

I knew that the tiger was Karen’s Guardian and would protect her from harm, always. The sky began to evaporate, and the portal constricted until there was only a pile of logs burning in the fireplace.

The room was dark and cold. I got up from the floor and walked over to the bar. I looked at the bottle of Stone Haven, then pulled out a glass and poured a long drink.

I walked out on the deck and stared into the heavens for a long time. A golden moon had risen in the west and now shone resplendent against the hollow black canvas of infinity. I thought about Karen and the promise that lies just beyond the island.

A feeling of loss surged through me, and a chill quivered in my bones. A single tear trickled down my cheek, and I cried into the night, “I don’t care where you are, Karen. I’ll find you again some day. I promise.”

A meteor streaked through the abyss, its tail sparkling like a cosmic fountain. I knew the night would never betray me and that my sojourn here was only a small part of something ineffable. I raised my drink to the lonely moon and toasted heaven and earth. The dream was over, and only my island remained.

to Challenge 345...