Goldilocks and the Three Bears: Beverly Hills
Tom Bear and his wife Sharon Bear who was holding their baby Tom Junior got out of their BMW and approached the mansion. The front door was slightly open and a security man was waiting their arrival. Tom had a suspicion what had happened and wasn’t surprised when he entered the house and saw the damage inflicted. A family portrait was ripped to shreds, and his favorite recliner and the bouncing baby seat were hanging by one swinging arm. His wife’s favorite chair was undamaged.
The security man said to the man as the family entered the mansion, “A break-in was reported at 9:23. The suspect caused a bit of damage in the living room, out here, and in the kitchen. There was also damage upstairs in your bedroom and in the nursery. Do you know of anyone who might want to do such a thing?”
“I have a very good idea who it might be. I was selecting some actresses for my latest project, ‘Murphy On the Go’, and one of them took rejection kind of hard. She’s a former porn star named Goldilocks who wanted to go legit and hoped being in one of my Murphy films might help her out.”
“Do you know what her real name is and where she lives?”
“My casting director ought to know. I’ll call him up immediately.”
As Mama Bear was climbing the stairs to put baby Bear to bed, Papa Bear flipped open his cell phone and called up Steve Montgomery’s number.
Seconds later, the phone was answered. “Steve Montgomery. Who’s calling?”
“This is Tom Bear. I had a little trouble over here in the Bear Den. Remember that actress who calls herself Goldilocks?”
“Yeah. She was one messed up babe.”
“You better believe it. She came over and caused some damage. Do you know her real name and where she lives?”
“Her name is Golda Nesson. She only gave me a post office box number and her cell phone number. I think she performs at Stilleto’s off of Sunset. Should I call the cops?”
“Nah. They’re probably there already enjoying the show. Let me handle it.”
“What are you planning to do?”
“I’ll go down and talk with her.”
“What if she’s a real nut case and tries to kill you? Shouldn’t you have someone to watch your back?”
“After what she’s done, she might not show up tonight. She was over here around 9:30, so she’s probably somewhere else.”
From the kitchen, the security man for the alarm company said, “I think you’re going to want to see this.”
Tom entered the room and saw the security camera view from inside the guest house on the kitchen monitor. Goldilocks was sleeping in the bed, passed out no doubt after drinking a couple bottles of vodka. “I know where she is,” Tom told his partner. “She’s in the guest house.”
Tom flipped close his phone and accompanied the security man out to the house. The door was ajar. The automatic lights came on as the men entered the building. They crept toward the bedroom toward the back of the house and entered the room where the woman was fast asleep. Her snoring would have drowned out any noise the men could have made.
As the security man was standing in the doorway, Tom approached the bed. The woman was wearing a thong and a tight T-shirt which was stretched out by her ample breasts, the best that money could buy. He shook her awake.
The woman shook her head and squinted as the bedroom lights were flicked on by the security man.
“What are you doing here?” he asked her.
“I wanted to see you and give you a personal demonstration of my acting abilities.”
She grabbed the bottom of her T-shirt and was about to pull it off when Tom grasped her hands.
“Please don’t. I just don’t think you’re right for the part of Murphy’s girlfriend. I’m looking for the girl next door; not the girl-gone-wild next door.”
“I want to have a chance to be more than a whore. Please, give me a chance. I’m begging you.” Tears began to well up in her eyes. This moved Tom. He slowly drew her to his chest and let her cry.
“I have a friend, Hank Parker, who is looking for some actresses like you. Not hookers, mind you. He could find them on the Strip or in the Valley. He’s casting for his latest project: ‘Danger Divas’. It’s about a secret mission that involves well-endowed actresses and exotic dancers who need to infiltrate a men’s club where terrorists are meeting. Do you have martial arts experience?”
“I have my brown belt in karate and kick-boxing. My former boyfriend wanted me to be able to take care of myself in case some crazy tried to grab me on stage.”
“I’ll call up Hank in the morning and tell him to expect you. You won’t go mental on him, will you?”
“I’m sorry for the damage. I resented you for not hiring me, so I ripped up the portrait and your chair. I also ate some of your food and drank some of your booze plus ripped up your bed and the crib. I’ll pay for the damage,” she offered.
“Don’t worry about it. It’s all insured. The security man can drive you back to your place since you’re in no condition to... I didn’t see a car outside.”
“I took a taxi over. I wanted to surprise you when you got home. But when I saw your wife and baby, I got a little psycho. I used a knife from your kitchen to do the damage. Can you forgive me?”
“Tell you what. I’ll let you crash here tonight and take you to the audition in the morning. I can give you one of my wife’s slutty outfits that she wears in bed to wear tomorrow. That should impress Hank.”
“Thank you, Mr. Bear. Your wife won’t get jealous?”
“I’ll introduce you to her in the morning at breakfast. I hope you don’t mind getting up at 7:00 since she has to be at her job by 8:30.”
“You make you wife work?”
“I don’t make her work. She wants to work. She’s in the business. She wrote a screenplay I used and we got the chance to meet on the set. It was literally love at first sight. We’ve been together ever since. She wrote a screenplay for one of my friends and is on the set Monday through Friday.”
“I’ll behave. Trust me.”
“Forgetaboutit.”
The men left the room and returned to the mansion. After the security man left, Tom went up to bed. The bed in the master bedroom was torn, so the couple had to sleep in the more cozy guest bedroom next to the master bedroom. Tom explained everything to his wife who was initially upset. But she eventually calmed down. The problem that had started out too big didn’t end up small. It was just right. The woman who looked too hot didn’t make Mama Bear too cold. The sweet expression on the wife’s face while she slept showed that everything, within reason, was just right. Tom hoped everything else would end up just right.
Copyright © 2005 by Bewildering Stories on behalf of the author
