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How It All Really Began

Once upon a time, before all mankind came to exist, there was a man. He had just always been there, for no reason at all.

In this ancient time there were no hills, no trees, no sea, no rivers and generally no anything.

So the man was bored. And seeing that he had all the time in the world, he decided to do something.

First he dug in the ground for some materials. The first one he found in any quantity he called “iron.” He fashioned himself a tool from this metal and began digging for more material. Soon he found a liquid he called “water.”

He liked the taste of water, and dug for more. And he dug and dug, and water filled every hole, becoming oceans, and the stuff from the holes piled up to form mountains.

And as the earth was watered, plants began sprouting, and the earth filled with plant life.

And animals sprouted into existence from the trees, and they slipped into the waters and filled them too.

And the man saw this, and was content.

He could eat the plants and the animals for the fun of it, though some made him queasy and others made him feel strange.

And man sat down on his couch, drinking from a coconut, just watching the sun set.

And man was happy until Mankind arrived in a spaceship from the skies, and they killed him and took over the place.

But the animals were unhappy when Mankind arrived, and the dinosaurs destroyed Mankind’s spaceship and were all destroyed in turn by Mankind, who ran completely out of ammo doing so and were forced to rely on nature to survive.

And that is how everything really began.

Copyright © 2005 by Bewildering Stories on behalf of the author

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